33 Signs You Might Be A Missionary…


  1. You can’t answer the question, “Where are you from?”   
  2. You speak two languages, but can’t spell in either. 
  3. You’ve home schooled your children going 65 mph down a highway in a minivan.
  4. You read National Geographic and recognize someone. 
  5. You have a time zone map next to your telephone. 
  6. You consider a city 500 km away to be “very close”. 
  7. You watch nature documentaries, and think about how good that animal would taste if it were fried. 
  8. You can cut grass with a machete, but can’t start a lawnmower. 
  9. You speak with authority on the subject of airline travel. 
  10. You have friends from or in 29 different countries.
  11. You sort your friends by continent. 
  12. You know that furlough is not a vacation. 
  13. You know how to pack. 
  14. Fitting 15 or more people into a car seems normal to you. 
  15. You refer to gravel roads as highways.
  16. You don’t think that two hours is a long sermon.
  17. You feel odd being in the ethnic majority. 
  18. Your life story includes “Then we went to” at least five times.
  19. You know the difference between 110 and 220 volts.
  20. You think VISA is a document stamped in your passport.
  21. You go to a church and find your picture on the bulletin board.
  22. You can’t wait to leave the States and go “home.”
  23. You have to fight panic when people drive on the right hand side of the road.
  24. You’ve been lost in a large foreign airport and knew what to do.
  25. Your suitcase has eighteen airline stickers on it.
  26. Your family sends you Kool Aid and peanut butter for your birthday.
  27. A national has said, “I knew an American once,” and asked if you knew him.
  28. When you see a golf course, you start looking for impalas and lions.
  29. All preaching sounds better under a corrugated roof.
  30. You get excited about finding Dr. Pepper at the grocery story.
  31. (For kids) Your Dad scolds you in a foreign language.
  32. You’ve ever dreamed in a foreign language.
  33. You know that having a nice car is safer but will cause you to lose support.

About James Rasbeary

I am the pastor of the Lighthouse Baptist Church in Wylie, Texas. Check out my blog at www.broraz.com.
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18 Responses to 33 Signs You Might Be A Missionary…

  1. Mrs. Losey says:

    I really enjoined the 33 signs that you might be a missionary…

  2. Yep, over half of them are true for me…

  3. Tori says:

    How funny, I can relate to almost all of these. Thanks for the laugh.

  4. Martha Smith says:

    Yes, so funny, but sooooo true! Missionary in Papua New Guinea with MK’s in the States. This was true for all of them as well. Our daughter shared this one with me. Thanks for the laughter! Home on furlough!

  5. Julie says:

    Thank you I’ve enjoyed this 🙂

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  7. So true. Especially #30! We used to hide the DP under the bed. Back in those days, the only drinks in cans in Mexico were alcoholic. When someone would bring a case of DP from the USA, we’d drink it behind closed doors so that no one would think we were drinking alcohol! LOL!
    Missionary Teacher to Mexico 1978-1981.

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  10. After 10 years in Kenya, these gave me a chuckle

  11. Robby says:

    It is so true for so many of US M.K.’s. Thank you Steven young for this. I spent 14 yrs in South America, living in Santiago, Chile and Caracas, Venezuela. I have had the privilege of visiting Lima, Peru when Rudy Johnson was a missionary there. We visited Quito, Ecuador and stood next to the monument of the Equator Line. On our way from New Orleans on the same freighter my folks sent our creates on we booked passage and although I was 4 or 5 at the time I still recall passing through the Panama Canal. I barely recall the guy who came on board at one of our many ports the ship stopped at and my brother tried so hard to get Dad to by a monkey as a pet. He never had a chance. We went to Bogota, Columbia and visited other missionaries my folks went to Bible College with. I am 50 now and still enjoy the memories.

  12. We have a similar type of list written up but it’s called the Why-I-regret-becoming-a-missionary (all tongue in cheek of course!) I am sure all of us could add more to that 33 list too!

  13. Enjoyed it and relate to it!

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